My birthday party

My birthday was last Thursday. Jay, Hannah and I met some family members for dinner at Applebees. We had a good time visiting together. I had the best birthday in years this year. Here are some of the pictures I caught. Mom has a really good one on her camera I want to snag soon. It's a hoot. All of these pictures were edited in Photoshop CS2 and I used two- three Pioneer Woman Actions, "Boost" from pack one, "warmer" and "seventies" from pack two.

The cheese girl. The girl LOVES cheese. But she's picky. She used to only eat processed American cheese food products. Then I broke the news that it wasn't real cheese. Good thing she's not a die hard Santa player. The cheese thing was hard enough! So she started exploring. We also eat real American cheese now. She likes to be patriotic like that. She loves Monterey Jack cheese in and on everything if she had the choice.

In the last six months, she has grown a love of fried Mozzarella now. Praise God.

You know ... I cannot remember the last time we took a picture this good. Seriously. Not even our wedding pictures were this good. He was smiling, too! Yes, that's a Jay smile for pictures. He usually doesn't smile. That's why you don't see a whole lot of "posed" pictures of us. This was his gift to me.

"Mommy what made you fall in love with daddy?" Hannah has asked. Well here ya go.

This picture also answers the question to how I can have such brown eyes and my children do not. Note: no additional eye filters were done to this picture. Yes, those are real! :)

You can see the rest of the birthday pictures on the Facebook page. Enjoy!

Family Update- April 24th

It's about time for an update, isn't it?
I'm doing ok. It seems if it's not one thing it's another going on (with me). If I'm not hit with a migraine I'm just overall feeling ... "uhg". I'm sure a lot of it has to do with my weight, so I am going to be focusing a lot of attention on that in coming weeks. I really do need a lot, a LOT of prayer regarding my motivation and will power as it pertains to eating habits and exercise. The problem with exercise is hip pain due to arthritis and now my right knee has been hurting significantly. I know it has much to do with the pressure my weight is putting on it. I'm still working on habits and routines, we're better than we were, but have a long way to go ;o) I did apply to Gymboree, but never heard anything back, so I'm going to assume it was not the Lord's will for us right now. Thing is, I have no peace about anything else, other than keeping children at home during the summer.

Jay's traveling a lot more with his job. We're so thankful we have not been affected job-wise because of the recession. The thing is, with his line of work, they are always hiring (not for what he does, but ...)- but you have to be physically fit to qualify. Oh~ and drug free :p Please do not apply for a job and waste yours and the company's time if there's a remote possibility you're not going to be able to pass a drug test! And do not think companys don't do random drug testing, because people are getting fired there for that, too! (Hence additional openings.) Very shocking news the other day was his boss as fired, which is bad because he really liked him and respected him. If you think about it please keep that situation in prayer- that his replacement won't be a royal jerk (it's true, right?) and that his new boss won't have a problem moving on to bigger and better things.
We got to take a mini vacation over Spring break in Virginia Beach and .... another town (lol) where a friend of Jay's lives. It was very nice. More pics to come, but you can see quite a few here.

We're looking forward to getting a garden planned soon (we're late!) and having a HUGE yard sale. We have SO much stuff we can get rid of, we're going to have to have a few yard sales just to get rid of it all. There's just too much to be able to get everything out at one time.

The kids are both playing soccer, and enjoying it a lot. Last week was their first game, they've been practicing about a month now. There are only three teams in Jackson's age group, so every other week he will be playing two games back to back. He has been deemed the primary goalie for the team though he's going to have opportunities to play in every position throughout the season. As active as he is I find it funny he'd choose goalie as a preferred position ;o) Hannah's just excited to be there, which makes me glad.

Some may have been wondering the stories behind my Wordless Wednesday post this week, I'm gonna share that separately. One hint- nothing to do with soccer ;o)
Hannah is still dealing with some degree of bullying (previous post), but what's being reported now is more regular mean-self-centered kid-type bullying. Jackson is determined he is going to make straight A's this quarter, after bringing home his best grades this year for 3rd quarter- two As and 3 Cs. That sounds good but for a child that has made all As his whole life ... not very hot- and he knows it.

I've always said that I would never pay or reward my kids for their grades, because they should get good grades anyway. Considering how rough this year has been, knowing he needs more motivation than fear of failing 4th grade (no danger at all, but apparently his teacher has brought it up enough generally speaking to the class it's been a fear of his...). We've told him he would get $20 for every A he makes for 4th quarter. He wants a new, "good" skateboard so he has a goal in sight. So we'll see how that goes. I know it's excessive, but I wanted to do something that would not only "get" his attention, but KEEP it for ten weeks. Please continue to pray about them getting back in their old school for next school year, that the Lord will give Jay wisdom to make the right decisions for our family concerning the many factors that plays into their return. We'd greatly appreciate it!

Jackson and I went to the local TEA party on tax day 4-15. We had a good time and enjoyed the experience. I was so proud to be an American that day. I had never attended a protest before, but it was so peaceful, and respectful. For us to be a group of extremists, we sure were nice! I thought it was hilarious when I saw on TV the next day some guy from Vanity Fair was saying "oh they weren't mad at all, they just seemed a little miffed more than anything" (paraphrase). Apparently, the liberal left thinks that you have to scream, holler, vandalize, interrupt speeches, and otherwise act like 5 year olds having a hissy fit for it to be a "real" valid protest. Apparently peaceful protesters just don't know what they're doing. Hmmm ... I'd be willing to disagree and call them to the floor on that!


Our local reps are planning more TEA parties in the future, and definitely one on Independence Day. It meant a lot for me as a parent to take part in it, and include Jackson in it. A long time ago our old Pastor said (paraphrase) "...one day when this country has went completely downhill, my grandkids are going to ask me what I done to stop it- and I want to be able to tell them I done everything I could...". I'll never forget that, and hold the same opinion. When Jackson is an adult, after conservatism reclaims this country through conservatives getting involved and finding their voices, and using them- he will be able to say "My mom and I were there when it all started ...". Some people think it's a moot point to talk politics with their children, but for me, that's HISTORY. I know nothing of the Regan years from first hand experience, and I was the same age then Jackson is now. Hannah is too young to appreciate what's going on, but Jackson is genuinely interested. Saturday we're going to the first meeting of our local 912 project. It's more of a meet and greet than anything I believe, but it's going to be fun. We're meeting at a local park and having potluck, etc ...

Hannah had her first field trip for the year. I know! They had one planned earlier in the year but it was cancelled. It was to this Health Center that was SO neat! I wish I could testify to how informational it was, but the models of internal organs freaked Hannah's little friend out, and we had to stay in the break room the WHOLE time we were there (2 1/2 hrs!). We had a nice time together though, it wasn't boring or anything. Time went by fast. Since her friend got NOTHING out of the field trip its self, I took the girls by the Krispy Kreme we passed on the way in (we were out of town). We had two of her buddies riding with us, and one her never been there before, so that was really exciting, especially since they were making the doughnuts when we got there!



Church is going great as always. I've been going out on Monday night visitation for a few weeks now, and it has been a great blessing. I've been wanting to start going for a good while now. I hope our family routine allows me to continue to do that :o) Jackson went out with some guys this week and he really enjoyed that. I learned Hannah has the option of staying at the church while I go out if needed, so that was a relief. Some weeks she's ok, others she's fickle about it. So we'll see.

Hope you all are doing well, and please link me to your own family updates by commenting! Don't forget about the giveaway!

Gratituesday 3-17

Last week, I learned on Tuesday morning that a sweet friend had passed on. I learned two weeks too late. I was not able to go to the funeral, comfort her family, look at her one last time. This time last year I was in "babyland", with Jordan here with me. Last year, last Spring, Jordan died at 6 weeks old, four days after our Spring revival on April 14th. I remember telling a friend at church Sunday- week ago how weary and odd I felt at the thought of having revival-at church. It was a month early according to the calendar, but for me, it took me right back to the thoughts and events that was going on the week before Jordan died. What a precious time that was with him. We had FINALLY found a nipple that he liked and nursed well from his bottle without struggling- that was a 2-3 week experiment in and of itsself.

As I was telling my friend how I was feeling, I said I felt as if, even though it was a year later- I was still waiting for the next shoe to drop. I still felt on pins and needles. I felt as if my pain was not over yet, and I was guilting myself because come on, it's been a year- lets feel better already! But that's the thing with grief. Grief has no timeline. I know this because seven years later- I know I am still grieving my grandmother. I cannot honestly tell you which pain has been worse, losing her, or losing Jordan. Really- I'd have to say her. I had my whole life with her. She was like my best friend. She was really the only grandparent I had growing up. But that's not here nor there, both hurt, tremendously.

My point- grief has no time frame, it is what it is, until it is, no more.

But then I go and open my email two days later after sharing how I was feeling with my friend, to have a new wave of grief staring me right in the eye. I could not believe what I read. One line. That was it. One line and my friend was gone- away- forever- to never see her again. Just like Jordan, last year. You know at least with grandma, she had been sick for a while. She was in the hospital for about two weeks before she passed. We were expecting it. She had lived a long, full life, she was ready for glory. My friend was 35 years old, Jordan was six weeks old. Death knows no age.

The bible says-
Psalm 118:1
"O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: because his mercy endureth for ever."

1 Thessalonians 5:18
"In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

Isaiah 61:10
"I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels."

Philippians 4:4
"Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice."

My grandmother was saved. My friend was saved. Both of them knew Christ as their Savior. Both of them are with the Lord right now, as well as Jordan. Sheila is up there right now probably rocking him and spoiling him rotten, as they sit by Jesus' feet. It took me months to get up after we lost Jordan, but I don't think Sheila would appreciate that or want that for me. I'm thankful that I can find out when I get there, why the Lord brought Sheila and Jordan home so early in their lives. I'm thankful for the knowledge of knowing for a fact where they are right now.

I cannot imagine the helplessness of not knowing where one of my loved ones are after death, and one of them might actually read this, who knows. If they do, I want them to know I love and care about them and want them to know where they are spending eternity. If anything, I want them to ponder the thought of what their loved ones will be thinking after their death- and maybe that would have them consider the idea that if they know they are going to heaven through the sacrifice of Christ on the cross, then their loved ones will know that as well because the change in their life will be that noticeable. Salvation is first and foremost about our own salvation, but lately I've pondered the thought, it's about your loved ones peace as well after you have left this world and left everyone else here to grieve over you.

"Three Things"

Copy this on your on blog post and put your answers in. Then tag a few good friends and / or family INCLUDING the person who tagged you. The theory is that you will learn things about your friends that you didn't know before.

I'm tagging:
Amanda- The Richardson Family
M~ Simple Reflections
Stacie- The Arizona Benningtons
Jennifer- PJ Academy
Nicole- The Graves' House
Amy- Growing Like Trees
Tara- Feels like home


THREE NAMES I GO BY
1. Wendy
2. Jackson / Hannah's mom / Mrs. Wood
3. calvarygirl (LOL)

THREE INTERESTING PLACES I'VE WORKED IN MY LIFE
Can't say I've really worked anywhere interesting as in "fascinating"=
1. McDs- you'd be amazed ...
2. childcare- a study in psych alone!
3. convenience store- again, a good way to study "people"

THREE PLACES I HAVE LIVED
1. Winston (current)
2. Mocksville (NC)
3. Albemarle, NC ("home of Kelly Pickler", lol)

THREE TV SHOWS THAT I WATCH
1. John & Kate Plus 8
2. Grey's Anatomy
3. Everybody Loves Raymond

THREE PLACES I HAVE BEEN
1. Washington DC (my "Phantom" trip)
2. Alabama (various places)
3. Gatlinburg, TN

THREE PLACES I WOULD LIKE TO GO
1. Italy
2. Ireland
3. back to Hilton Head, SC

THREE OF MY FAVORITE FOODS
1. Krispy Kreme Doughnuts (lets be honest, right?)
2. Fettucini Alfredo from my fav Italian place
3. Jay's fried squash

THINGS I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO
1. the kids going back to private school
2. getting organized
3. GNO with my BFF

THREE PETS THAT YOU HAVE OWNED
1.^Temone^, my mini schnauzer of 13 yrs (til 4-07)
2. ^Mickey^, my black kitty of 15 years (til 10-08)
3. Timothy and Titus, our current fat tabbys (they come as a unit, lol)

THREE FRIENDS WHO WILL REPLY
1. Amanda- The Richardson Family
2. Nicole- PJ Academy
3. Jennifer- Growing Like Trees

THREE FAVORITE TEAMS TO WATCH
1. Jackson's basketball team
2. Jackson's soccer team
3. Wake Forest

THREE FAVORITE DRINKS
1. Sweet Tea
2. Gloria Jeans Cafe Mocha
3. McD's coffee

Three top Concert experiences:
1. Shania Twain (first time, a long while back)
2. Shania Twain (second time, a long while back)
3. WS Symphony?

Three Things that make your SKIN CRAWL:
1. Tarantulas (sp?)
2. nails on a chalkboard
3. adult vomit (eeww, why is it I can handle kid vomit better?)

Three Things that calm me down when I am stressed:
1. Praying
2. someone praying for me
3. sticking my head in a freezer (if panic is involved!)

Three Most Dangerous things I have ever done:
1. hmmmm .... I might not want to answer this ;o)

What a week!

This is going to be a busy week for us. Our Spring revival started last night (Sunday) and it lasts through Wednesday night. Thursday morning I leave for Virginia for the Ladies Prayer Advance, and I'll be gone through Saturday afternoon. Then mom reminded me today that this Saturday night is the night I had planned to go to the Steven's Center with them cause they had extra tickets, lol I'm going to be SO tired!!

I'm excited about the prayer advance though. I have fond memories of past ones I've been to. The first one, I had no idea what it even was. We had not been back in church for very long, and my mentor at the time just said "there's a paid slot, and I'd love you to go with me", and my thoughts was "hey, three day trip with the ladies from church, no money required, I'm in!". Little did I know. I can just say that most people only think they have experienced revival, until they've attended one of these events. I went to the one in '01, then another one in '03.

Basically it's breakfast- morning session (preaching & worship, lasts 1 1/2-2 hours each session) - lunch - rest an hour - afternoon session - workshop (optional) - dinner - evening session. Basically, up to six hours a day on Thursday and Friday of worship and preaching, you leave Saturday after the early-afternoon session. No cell phones, no TVs, no computers, no land lines (except for the main building). You are completely separated from the "outside world" for that time period.

I know six hours of "church" can make someone wonder how that can be exciting, but when you go expecting to meet the Lord there, expecting that "something", be assured- He is going to meet you! Like Jacob wrestling all night with the angel of the Lord, he held on TIGHT to that angel, fighting, until he got his blessing.

I have no idea what will come about this weekend, but I do know that eight years ago I went, and I come back a completely changed person. That weekend saved my marriage- literally. The Lord dealt with me and changed me in ways that weekend that can be attributed to nothing short of a miracle from God. Jay's still amazed to this day I think- cause that is one thing he does not hesitate to encourage me in, lol I think if he had to drive me up there and drop me off at the front door he would! LOL The Lord dealt with me on my pride problem, and showed me how pride can ruin everything in your life- every relationship you have. and He dealt with that seriously in depth! My blessing? a saved marriage and Hannah was conceived two weeks later ;o) I say she's my prayer advance baby :p

This year is going to be extra special for one, because revival is this week. My heart is going to be right from session one! ;o) Also, my retired Pastor is the preacher for this year's advance! He retired last March and our current Pastor "took the reigns". He had been on staff working as Associate Pastor three years prior, so it was an extremely smooth, precious transition and time for the whole church. But it's been a year since I've heard him preach ;) we're talking about the man who led Jay and I to the Lord, it was his ministry and preaching that brought us to salvation, and his ministry that led my kids to salvation. He's a very special person to us. So I'm excited.

The fellowship, the preaching, the time away to just focus on God, man, what a great weekend it will be! Please pray for us all, and for my family. I really hope revival will be special for Jackson. He's struggling so right now. Thank you!

Family Update- (long and possibly upsetting)

I thought it might be time for another family update and let y'all know what's new with us :) You might have read last week that Jay was able to get a new truck. This has been a tremendous blessing and burden off of him. For him to be able to leave out for work in the mornings and not have to worry about whether something pops up like a kid getting sick at school, if something comes up at work and he is not able to get home in time to pick up the kids (thus having to depend on my parents to jump in in an hour's notice some days ..). With having his own vehicle, he is able to do his job better, and that actually, for us, brings in more income for us- which is a HUGE bonus!

Speaking of income, I am currently pondering my resume and plan on applying to Gymboree for a part time job while the kids are still in school. I'd appreciate prayers concerning that, if you think about it. That is where I love getting Hannah's clothes and the emplyees always pick around when I'm in there cause I squeeze our dollars so tight and get such good deals there, lol If employed, I'll be able to get a 40% discount off regular price, which is awesome considering there have been a number of outfits I've really liked, but missed getting because they sold out before the discount was good enough for me. I really believe this will be something I will enjoy doing a lot. I already have dealt with the staff quite a bit and they are all really friendly, especially the asst manager. The store manager assured me she was able to work with my availability, and no weekends if I was not available- which is huge for me.

My mistake the last time I "went back to work"- it was a good opportunity, a wonderful job, but more than our family really needed to take on. I wanted part time and they were only willing to offer full time. The pay was higher (by dollars) than what I would be making with Gymboree I'm sure, but I believe when you're honoring God with your money, He will honor you, too.

Our goal with the extra money is going to be getting the kids back into private Christian school. Until this school year, they had only been there, then this school year the Lord led us to take a break to regroup not only our finances but our family. It has been an interesting school year, and I have no doubt we're in the Lord's will right now with the kids in the charter school, but it's one of those situations you think sometimes "why me? why do I have to do this?", but there have been many things revealed, many blessings, and our family has come much closer as a result of this change.

The change has not been without challenges. The main one, is Jackson. He is struggling with school in a big way. Now that we're in third quarter, the pressure is really on him, and he is showing it. It's become apparent he has lost a lot of respect for his teacher, and it hurts to see. He's not a disrespectful child, there are reasons behind his thoughts, that I do not doubt. From some things he has said, I can see it through his perspective. My conclusion is the school''s educational philosophy is not conducive for him.

You cannot take a child that has made straight A's the first four years of his life, effortlessly; going into the 4th grade with a 7th grade reading level; having attended a school whose test scores were GRADE LEVELS above the national average (his class was two grades above); and watch his grades plummet into Bs, Cs and Ds, and say it is the child. You cannot just claim "irresponsbility" against the child, when there's TOO MUCH for said child to have to keep up with! I agree a child needs to learn to be responsible, but there is such a thing as "too much". WE have a hard time keeping up with his work and what hes expected to do! Why is there just as much emphasis put on whether worksheets are turned in, as there is tests? Don't the tests prove whether the child is learning?

I just disagree with the way things are done. He used to enjoy school, and enjoy learning. That has been completely sucked out of him. So, I'm trying to encourage him to do his best. I am not going to tell him they are going back to their old school because right now, I still do not know 100%. I just know, that is what we want, and are praying for.

Speaking of praying, this has been such a big a hit to him- the other day I said something about praying for something to happen and his response was "what good does it do to pray? nothing ever happens!". Oh that broke my heart. But that showed me he's at a point in his life where his relationship with the Lord is his own, and he's going to have to work that out hisself. I do know, that if he does get back to the old school for next school year- he's going to be a completely different child. That I have no doubt. He will never forget this experience. His burden for the lost is much stronger, but his personal relationship is weaker, if that even makes sense. I found a kid devotional website yesterday, and plan on implementing that in our days. We talk about spiritual things and the bible every day, but I'm thinking this might put more of a narrow focus for them.

Hannah is facing her own challenges now, and I'm watching her carefully. About two-three weeks ago, she spoke up and said the kids were mean on the playground. Now, anyone that knows my Hannah, knows that she is a heart a thousand miles wide, and will give anyone the shirt off her back if she saw they needed it. She shares everything. She is friends with everyone. She meets NO strangers. She was recognized at the end of second quarter she was recognized for forgiveness! So to hear people were mean to her? That grabbed my attention.

I asked her how people were mean to her, what happens, etc ... She said "The African American kids tell me every day they don't want me on their team because I'm white." :-O I asked if the teacher was watching the teams getting picked and she informed me it was free play type of teams. So you have these first graders (!!!) on the playground, deciding to play a game, dividing into teams- all healthy, normal as far as social development ... and yet, somehow, racial bias has already been taught either by word or action in the lives of these children. and it's not the white kids!

So Hannah is coming home each day for Lord only knows how many weeks this had been going on before she decided to tell me (she just says they "always" do it, no telling with a first grader, kwim?) wondering why kids don't want to play with her because she is white. It just bewilders me, how parents can ... NOT know, their kids say these types of things. Then I think about the comment our new Attorney General said last week about us essentially being a "nation of cowards" when it comes to race.

"Though this nation has proudly thought of itself as an ethnic melting pot,
in things racial we have always been and I believe continue to be, in too many
ways, essentially a nation of cowards," Holder said.
Race issues continue to be a topic of political discussion, but "we, as
average Americans, simply do not talk enough with each other about
race."

Well I have the answer to ALL of the hoopla- if you teach your children that God created us ALL to live up to our God given potential in life, that he died for the WORLD, that God sees NO COLOR~ then we won't really have racial issues in this country now will we!!?? When are people going to GET OVER THIERSELVES!!?? Seriously! I think we talk TOOOOO much about race!

My kids don't care what color the skin is of another child, they look at the content of the heart. and even then- they forgive! Case in point, the racial comments come home over a week ago. Day before yesterday, we're sititng at the table eating and she said "B got on RED today.". Red is the worse offense you can get, it calls for a trip to the principal's office, and a call to the parents. Usually, "M" is the one that gets in that much trouble, and Hannah has been praying for M quite often this school year. But this boy, I don't really recall hearing much of.

I do know, that there's only one white boy in her class and his name is A. As she's sitting there eating her mashed potatoes I ask why B got put on red ... "He hit me on the playground." :::deep breath::: I ask her to share what happened. "We were on the playground and I told him the chicken joke. He said he didn't like it and he punched me in my head and ran off. It hurt, too." Her teacher promptly handled it and done exactly what I would expect a teacher to do, except B refuses to apologize to Hannah (but I don't believe in forced apologies either), and I was informed by Hannah, and not a note from school. I know it's elementary school, but I still believe it would be appropriate for teachers to have that kind of communication with parents. I realize she did not have a black eye, or a bruise, or a bloody lip, but, she was still hurt.

So she's told by the black kids at school that they don't want to play with her because she's white. She used to be buddies with one of the black girls, but they're not close any more because her friend is playing with the other black girls. Hannah was, at the beginning of the year, one of two white girls in the class, since the beginning there's been another white girl put in that class. She's being isolated because of her color, and now, a black BOY hits her. There's another GIRL, the same one, that is apparently telling Hannah she has fat legs (she doesn't, she's not a string bean, but shes not heavy by a mile!)
This is after a number of days of her coming home "tired" and ready to go to bed early most nights. and she's "tired" when she wakes up. I mean she plays at home, but overall, she's complaining quite a bit about being tired. She sleeps ten hours a night, too.

Is Hannah becoming depressed? Fatigue is a symptom of depression, and frankly, racial tension for a first grader is a bit too much. I'm not sure when it's time to speak up and say something. I know kids will be kids, but if the situation were opposite, I can't help but to wonder if something would have been done by now :o(

So. That's what's going on with us. pray as you see fit!

Happy Birthday Jordan

A year ago today, a sweet little bundle of joy come into our life. He was our great nephew #2, Jordan. I was already babysitting his big brother Braden full+ time. I was back in "toddlerland", well on my way back to "babyland". The house was babyproofed, we were stocked up with Cheerios and Goldfish crackers. We had a toybox in each room of the house, Braden had his own cabinet in the kitchen to plunder through. Due to mom being on maternity leave, Braden's paternal grandma volunteered to keep him part time while mom adjusted to "life with infant".


Three weeks later Jordan would join us full time as mom went back to work. Being an assistant convenience store manager, 70 hour weeks was not uncommon to us. The first day back, my having both of the boys while the kids were at school, while they were both napping, I fell off our back steps spraining my ankle. It was rough, thank the Lord the boys were asleep! A friend brought the kids home and mom come to get the boys a few hours later. It was agreed that paternal grandmother would keep Braden while my ankle healed.

Without having a distraction of toddler-like proportions, I was literally back in babyland. It was me and Jordan. Since mom opened the store most mornings, she would drop him off around 4:30 every morning. She had her own key so she would leave the sleeping bundle of preciousness in our bedroom so I would hear his little squeaks easier as he was a very quiet baby. Usually he would wake within the hour of his arrival. He had his own portabed, bouncyseat, and I even had an exersaucer for when he got bigger. I was so proud of mom pumping when she was away, she done her best- even fighting a case of mastitis that led to us supplementing with formula.


I was back to the whole routine that fit so well for me with my own two. Eat, burp, play, sleep. He was such a little guy. Hannah was petite for a girl, but Jordan was a lil fella, like a lil peanut. We were so in sync I could look at his face and tell you what he was up to- sleepy, hungry, gas, etc .. The most precious moments were him laying in the floor beside me as I would fold clothes. I loved watching him learn to focus on my face, learn how to toss his arms back and forth, and kick those legs. It seemed to take him longer to do those things than Hannah and Jackson, so it seemed that I found myself watching him closer.

Picking up the kids from school was fun. The both looked so forward to getting in the car and talking to him on the way home. Jackson had no problem playing the "entertainer". They both had been missing Braden anyway- so the baby was a nice distraction for them. We were all ready for Braden to come back as we noticed my ankle healing.


Friday, April 11th, I had plans to go to a local theater with my aunt as free tickets had fell in our laps. I had picked up my dad from work and brought him back to the house because Jordan's mom (our neice, Brandy) could take him home on her way home, after picking up the baby that evening. She had not gotten there when it was time for me to leave right after supper, so I leaned over and kissed lil bit on the top of his soft- almost bald head and told him I would see him Monday, as mom was supposed to have the weekend off.

Little did I know ....


Monday morning I woke on my own about 7:45. I got up and walked through the house to get my coffee started, and spoke to Jay. That night I had had a horrible, HORRIBLE feeling dream. I mentioned it as I was going back in the bedroom to Jay. My dream was more about a distinct feeling rather than a vivid memory of the visual.

I remember it being as if, in my sleep, I was physically feeling like every nerve in my body was being electrocuted on a low wattage, just enough for you to be alert enough to know something is WRONG. I remember screaming to whoever would listen in my dream, that something BAD was about to happen- that I did not know what it was, but it was happening SOON and it was very, Very, VERY bad. It was one of those dreams where you wake up the next morning thinking "Oh man, I'm so tired..." cause the dream took so much energy from you. very intense.

Jay's phone rang about 8:10. I remember sitting on the bed and him coming in the room saying "it's your sister, it's not good, do you want to talk to her?", I told him to tell her I'd call her back, because I knew I can handle bad news coming from Jay better than her. Brandy woke up that morning to start getting ready for work as she had a mid shift that day. Jordan had a restless night, and she had him sleeping on his side in the bed with her. She went to wake him up, to find that sometime between 4am and then, he had died in his sleep. His face was blue.


Final verdict was accidental death. His head had turned down, causing his trachea to bend over like a straw, because infants do not have the cartilage around their windpipes to protect that from happening. His neck muscles were not strong enough for him to lift his head up for him to be able to get air. By far, that ranks way up there with the "worst days of my life".

to be continued ...

The first thing I ever made in Photoshop (and not a reflection of things I'm doing now, lol)

Why I love blog giveaways

9/5/11: Welcome to my blog! I welcome you to join me on the homepage, and lets start to get to know each other from there! :) Lets connect on Twitter, and on Facebook, too!

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You've probably noticed I'm into Giveaways by now. I just found the "Giveaway concept" on December 4th, when Sew Mama Sew done the HUGE Giveaway Day. It was SO huge, people extended their deadlines for days because the list was SO big it was impossible to get halfway through it in a day! But through that giveaway, I found some of my first bloggy friends and blogs I enjoy following.
These would be the people in the "crafty" blogs category in my sidebar. There might be more that was moved into the Homemaking category, too. (I don't remember 100%),

Nicole from Mom Saves Money shared why she loved blog giveaways, and I have to say, I'm in 100% agreement. I can't say at this point about giveaways bringing people back to my own blog, because I'm not sure that's happened. I haven't been approached by companies yet, but that sure would be nice! I haven't hosted a giveaway yet, but I have a couple in the works ;o)

Nicole says:

Here are the reasons I love to enter blog giveaways:
1. Free stuff This is
obvious. Who doesn't love to win free stuff?
2. Great chance to win Most
giveaways have 100 to 300 entries and therefore your chances to win are pretty
good.
3. Finding new blogs I have found some of my favorite blogs when they
host a giveaway.
4. New products I am introduced to exciting new products or
companies through blog giveaways. 5. Attracts new readers Others see my post on
the giveaway and may click through to check out my blog.
6. Attracts
companies to run promotions Since the blog giveaway carnival, several companies
have seen my entries on other blogs and approached me to run promotions for
them.

It might be cool to note Nicole's inspiration for said post, see what all she's won in the past month!

25 things I love about Jay

1. He loves the Lord.
2. He works hard to provide for our family.
3. He shares the same conviction about my staying home.
4. It's rare we don't see things the same way (there are exceptions, though.)
5. His driving is better than mine.
6. He can stay calmer than me in a crisis (I think he's rubbed off on me.)
7. He still loves me now as much as he did when we started, even though we've both changed a lot.
8. His sacrificial spirit.
9. He's a content man, not into "stuff"- gadgets, toys, etc ...
10. He'll take me fishing and offer to bait my hook.
11. He watches some of my shows with me, without whining about it.
12. He loves, respects, and cares for his mother.
13. He loves being a dad.

14. He loves being in a ministry in church.
15. His McDreamy eyes.
16. He is very handy and can fix about anything.
17. He is resourceful.
18. He makes me laugh.
19. He trusts my judgement (but does not hesitate to challenge it if he disagrees with something.)
20. Getting a computer was his idea (lol)
21. He's a neat person (but not OCD).
22. He's never been the jealous or possessive type.
23. He likes to cook, and will come home from work and cook for us some days.
24. He's punctual (which balances my lateness, we'd never get anywhere if it was otherwise)
25. He loves me :o)

Wow! That was easy! I wrote that in a fraction of the time it took me to write 25 things about myself, LOL!!

25 Things about me

One of my bloggy-heros Gisele tagged me! I'm a bit delayed in answering here, but alas, I don't have just six things, I have twenty five! Yes, if you are on Facebook you've probably been hit with a tag or two in the past couple of weeks. I actually got tagged with a "Sixteen things ...", then a week later with the "25 things ...", so I wrote a "Nine more things...". (That's about as creative as I think I've been lately.)

The rules say I'm to tag six people, so the six lucky people will be:
Stacie, Melissa, Nicole, Amy, Sherra, and Becki

So here we go!~

1) I'm enjoying the bloggyworld these days, and have realized it can be time consuming!

2) I'm the youngest of two, my sister is 12 1/2 years older than me.

3) I'm still laughing over Hannah misprouncing Pastor Vernon's name as "Pastor Vermon" over the holidays.

4) I think of things as the same span of time for years at a time. My mom has been 62 for a few years (her birthday is tomorrow, remind me to ask her how old she is); Jay's grandma has been 80 since we visited her when Hannah was 2-3 years old (she's seven) ... and I'm still 28- didn't ya know?!

5) I'm a news junkie.

6) As a teen I stood in line with friends (you know who you are) for three hours to get NKOTB tickets.

7) 2008 pretty much changed my perspective on life. Aside from human loss, we lost five pets as well. It was a hard year! But my God is faithful *g*

8) I love playing in photoshop.

9) I host a message board called "Frugal Kitchen".

10) I'm trying to read my bible in a year's timeframe.

11) I've broken my arm ... about seven times.

12) I broke my nose about two years ago and still laugh about the accident (though I wasn't laughing the first year afterward, lol - that'll explain some of my flair ;)

13) I thoroughly enjoy working with the three year old nursery every Sunday monring- lately we've been having between 20-25! woo-hooo!

14) I've only been camping once, when I was in elementary school, at a friend's house, and we went inside in the middle of the night (and I wonder if *she'll* remember that when she reads this)

15) I'm very proud of my husband and don't think I tell him enough.

16. We love Mexican food. Every Sunday we go eat at our favorite Mexican restaurant after church. It's our little tradition. I'd like to find some good dishes to make at home to save some money and maybe do it every other week.

17. A little girl named Gracie and a little boy named Dante swooped into my life in 2008, and without ever meeting them face to face they made me want to be a better mother.

18. I have four pregnant mice, Dakota, Julie, Ruby and Speck. Itsy is the runt, she managed to not get pregnant. The potential fathers are Marty, Despereaux, Max, and Feivel. Anyone want some pet mice? (Update, we ended up with 21 and they've been reduced to 9 remaining now, we held them today! so sweet!)

19. I played violin in HS. I've always said before I die I'd like to learn how to play "Devil went down to Georgia" . I'd also like to be good at Phanton of the Opera, and the theme to Rocky (not eye of the tiger, the other one). Oh and the Nutcracker Suite. That's in a Symphony- the WS symphony would be fine AND dandy :D

I've always thought it would be nice to be able to teach the kids to play too.

20. If I had my way I would be getting mani - pedi's at Lambertis Spa every week.

21. I quiz our kids on family history to make sure they remember it.
Yesterday they were debating over who got to cut the last dill pickle in half for them to share. I asked them "how did mommy and daddy meet?", Jackson had it on the tip of his tongue and Hannah blurted it out and won- it was so funny cause she was hopping up and down as she was saying it like she was on the Price is Right.

22. Until a few weeks ago, Gone with the wind, steele magnolias and fried green tomatoes were at the top of my movie list (animated moves aside) ... then I saw PS I Love You, and that movie knocked them all down a notch.

23. I got my GED in '05 promptly after Jackson realized mommy never graduated high school. It was a big deal to him, still is to this day. Four years later he still talks about it.

24. I pretend to be interested in football for Jay and ask questions during the game (though I blog while the games are on). I guess it's useful knowledge for when you do watch it though. (Kim, ssshhhhh!)

25. I wasn't a girlie girl until high school. I'm thinking this is why I enjoy Jackson so much. I enjoy Hannah, but little girls are so weird sometimes! ;o)

Life

Categories pertaining to the "Life of CalvaryGirl"

Update on us

It's been a bit crazy here since Christmas, really. You might remember my waking the day after with a sore throat resulting in a doctor's visit that Saturday for them to say, strep throat. That took its toll. I thought I was doing better for the pain to come back horribly the next weekend, along with a migraine.
The next week Hannah started getting sick, but we thought she'd be ok. Days after, she started a cough, and I started feeling bad again. We went to the Dr later that week, for her to have an upper respiratory infection, and me to have both ears "this close" to being infected, and a sinus infection.
A couple days later, Jay started feeling bad, resulting in a very sore throat and fever. That was last week- Jackson started feeling crummy Saturday, running a low grade fever Sunday, and 102o fever Monday (yesterday). Hannah was home today with a belly ache and chesty coughing.

We've been a little busy ;o)

As a result, my blogging has suffered. For that, I apologize. This week I hope to do better. Not only my blogging, but I have been unable to spend time on the forum I host, Frugal Kitchen. If this is a topic that interests you, please come by and chat a little with us. It's been somewhat quiet lately! You'll need to register with iVillage, but it's free and they don't bite *g*
Not only has my online stuff lagged, but the house looks horrible (again!) Just as I was getting things straightened again, I'm in bed for a weekend and it looks like a tornado ran through it. Does this happen to anyone else? Or is it the fact the house isn't organized enough as it is that it only takes the slightest negelect for all the blocks to come falling down?

Jay's busy as ever working up a storm. He was home for two days last week (or was it three with the holiday?) so he's been playing catchup there. It can take a lot out of him too bless his heart. I can only imagine coming back to my inbox to find 400 emails, and know I couldn't go through and delete half of them right off the bat! :-O We've been discussing health insurance and I did not realize just how cheap his company is, but they really are!
We cannot afford to be insured through their carrier, so I'm going to have to look for a private family policy that is within our price range- that would actually cover maternity as well. We could probably afford private insurance without maternity, but who really wants to get into that kind of bind knowing your births cost $30k+? Then again, what are we doing now?

Jackson is doing better ... sort of. His perspective is getting better. He's had a lot of trouble adjusting to their new school. (They started a charter school after attending a private Christian school every year beforehand.) His grades have went from straight A's to Bs and Cs on average :( It's not the material, it's obvious he knows it because he aces all of his tests. His "NWEA" testing is high as well.
{NWEA's is the tests his school has to give students at the beginning of the year to measure where the student are academically, then they test mid year and end of year to prove they're actually teaching the students and accomplishing academic goals. If they cannot prove this, they lose funding and the school is closed, basically.}

It seems like he has a large workload, at home. So our challenge has been trying to find out the balance, and keeping him motivated to do his work at home. His health is showing his stress over this, in that his attendance has suffered due to him getting sick more often than usual. We've had some problems with him having hours worth of work at home, and he's been spent on the topic of homework. I've been spent at the idea of him being at school all day and coming home to have to work for two hours on homework! But after watching him more closely, he's not using his time wisely at home so that's our focus right now- keeping him focused.

I've counseled with a wise sister in Christ about this problem and she suggested incentives last week. I've never been one big on incentives with school work because my view generally is, they should do well in school because that's their job. Daddy goes to work every day for a paycheck, that's his job. Kids go to school each day, to get an education, so one day they'll be able to get a job and make money. BUT~ at this point, I'm open. So tonight, I told him if he got his homework done in an hour or less, we'd give him $3 a day. (I realize that might be excessive, but I figure after the good habit is formed, we'll work extra duties into the $3 total.) Whaddya know- he done it tonight. Score! Praise the Lord. He didn't have time to really complain, either ;)

He's made me proud, though.
He has really held up his standards at the new school and refuses to lower them. SO much, he's friends with everyone, but close with none of them. There's one girl in his class that went to the old school that was in his k4 class, and he talks to her, but since he's resolved not to really have girl-friends (as buddies), they only talk so much. He's talked to all of the boys enough to conclude NONE of them are saved, so while he talks a lot with one boy, his discernment tells him a close friendship is not possible because they don't share the same values.
This is all him- all I've done is listen to him. I give God the glory for this! Of course this is not to say when he gets older he might become close with a child that is not saved and following Christ (and be able to handle it), but his convictions right now are different.

Another area of growth I've seen in him is music.
He's gotten an interest in skateboarding, and is an avid youtube fan. Looking up youtube videos related to skateboarding, apparently some are clips put together to music. We were watching some the other night and he was looking at the titles and said "This is good but let me turn the volume down because I don't like the music" ... when the opening credits come up, the music was "TnT" by AC/DC. He was right, the video was really neat, even without the music. Same with his video games. He got a new skateboarding game, and looked up in the owners manual how to turn off the music and the talking. The speech wasn't profane, but had "filler" phrases he knows are unsuitable and he knew so.

My heart has been so blessed to see him make these decisions and guard his heart in this way. He is however ready to go back to private Christian school and has said so many, many times. The main thing he says he misses is Bible class each day (and chapel). I told him we could do something similar at home and he assures me it's not the same ;o) I pray the Lord will give us discernment and open some doors so at least he can get back there for next year- even if I have to drive to two schools each day!

Hannah auditioned last week for the school talent show. She sang the"Cuppycake song". She got a callback for a second audition. However- the note said the chosen song must be 2-3 minutes long. Cuppycake isn't! Oh no! We're trying to find a song she has sang in the past she can sing for the second audition. The only one we can think of is the song from the '06 CCS Heritage Program theme song "America, turn back to God"- but she's forgotten the words right offhand and we'd need to get the music somehow- by next Tuesday! Any Calvary friends reading this- any ideas?
Other than that, she's doing GREAT. She made all "4"s on her report card, and it comes so naturally for her. She really loves her teachers, and the assistant has said she really shines, and is an excellent example to her friends.
I was playing in Photoshop with a picture I took of her right after Christmas and it turned out really good, don't you think? I'm using that graphic as my signature on Frugal Kitchen :o)

She made me proud this weekend. She spent the weekend with my mom and dad, and they went shopping. Mom told her to pick out a Barbie video she wanted so she was choosing very carefully, looking at every one, mom said. She does this, too- she's not a child who when let loose in a toy store picks the first flashy thing that catches her eye! Mom pointed out a newer one, 'Barbie Diaries', and mom said she looked it over, and was looking at the back of the cover when she said "Maw maw, I don't want to get this one. It says it has rock music in it and I don't listen to rock music" and she handed it back! My parents had no idea of the kind of music the kids preferred, and seeing I used to constantly listen to rock - mom apparently assumed we still did. It floored her but she didn't push. (Just like when they went clothes shopping, my parents have learned- Hannah will NOT wear pants! ;)

So the Lord's showing me, that if we just pay attention, we'll know how our kids are really doing just through the little things. Praise Him!!

I must go, Jay just brought food in. Hope everyone is well!!

Nails going down a chalkboard

Time to learn something new about me.
Hi, I'm Wendy and I'm a "news junkie". I love Fox News. I followed the election very closely. I stayed up late the night of the Iowa caucus ;) I DVR America's Newsroom every morning so I can watch Bill and Megyn- Megyn rocks. I love her. They make news FUN ;) But I also DVR Hannity (previously Hannity & Colmes), Huckabee, sometimes Greta, but always Bill O'Reilly. I'm a DVR freak. I'll purposely start watching something 30-40 minutes later JUST so I can be DVR'ing it, while simultaneously watching it so I can fast forward the commercials. I like commercials, but only in moderation and when I only have a few minutes of folding laundry while watching something, I'll forego the commercials. If I'm blogging, the commercials stay on.

Did you grow up in the 80's? I did, barely. Sort of, I went through grade school beginning in the 80's. But I do remember something.
When President Regan was on TV, it was OVER! You might as well go to bed because your shows were NOT being shown that night- (AND! as Jeff Foxworthy said "and he's on all three channels!!" lol)

Yes, I followed the election closely. Closely enough, I went through a mini withdrawel from not seeing poll numbers not long after November 4th. Close enough, you can talk to my son about politics and he'll explain to you a few things ;) he has one friend at school, and when asked one time "So do you have a lot in common?" he answered "Well, I mean he's a democrat but besides that ..." (lol, love the innocence).

Close enough, I'm tired of hearing about (of course the obvious O...) Hilary's voice!! Kerry talking right now is just- AAHHH!!! So I'm playing A.N. and what's going on? Hilary's confirmation hearings. Yeeeessss ... it's news.

But I feel likeI'm in fifth grade, settling down to watch the Golden Girls and President Regan just come on and hijacked all three channels! I can't get my Bill and Megyn fix today because of Hilary! uhg Guess that's why I have an extra dose of housework today.

Nails ... screeching ... chalkboard.

Thank you Lord, for DVR- as that's getting turned off and deleted!

My profile

Sunday, May 20th, 2007, 10:57 pm

I'll eventually add to this post...Shout out for my favorite boards!
Creating Websites and Graphics
Christian Family Life
TV Lovers

In a nutshell:
I'm a 31 yo FT WOTHM to Jackson (1/99) & Hannah (12/01). I've been married to Jay since 7/98, (though we've been together since 2/95.) I work in childcare, and am currently working on as Associate's Degree in Early Childhood Education. In my spare time I love to make digital graphics using PSP8, plus AS3. Jay and I become Christians in May '97, and we are very involved in our church.
Interests & Activities:
I love playing in Paint Shop Pro, creating digital scraps and signatures. Be sure to come by Creating Websites and Graphics and request a siggie there. Practice makes perfect ya know! I also love to cook and have been reading up on various ways to cook (and ultimately eat) healthy (aka "clean eating"). I'm interested in losing a lot of weight ;o) I'm becoming more and more interested in Vegetarianism, and have been hanging out on the Vegetarian Cooking board lately.Causes & Charities I care about:
My children's private Christian school is considered a "charity"; and I care very much about our school and do whatever I can to support it. Outside of missions, our school is my charitable burden. Best advice I have ever gotten:
"Let Go, let God" "Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." -- Proverbs 3:5-6 My Hopes & Dreams:
Seeing both of my children living their lives dedicated to serving our Lord Jesus Christ. While only God can actually "accomplish" that, make it happen, as their mother it's my responsibility to live it in front of them. So I'll just keep drawing nearer to him and stay out of His way ;o) Best day of my life (so far!) The day I accepted Jesus Christ into my heart as my Lord and Savior.

I was tagged ... 5 weird things about me

Tuesday, February 27th, 2007, 11:46 pm


and I only get to pick FIVE. Hmmmm ....

List 5 weird things about yourself or your pets. Tag 5 friends and list them. Then, those people need to write on their blogs about 5 weird things, and state the rules, and tag 5 more people. Dont forget to let the people you tag know by posting a comment on their blog!

I do better with "guy time" with ds than I do "girl time" with dd.

I can successfully play NO sports whatsoever ... I don't think.

I love to bake things, I just don't really care to eat the things I bake, although they taste yummy!

I'd rather stick with PSP 8 than upgrade.

I like to vaccume ---

adding #6- I need to add more friends so I can tag 5 people!!
Who shall I tag? Mia, Nikki, Sis, Cathi & Pat ...

Getting to know me

This is gonna turn into my "novel of moi". I need a good title for this, got any ideas?
I'm going to start with seven ....

1) Have your kids had the chicken pox?
Neither of mine have had chicken pox as of yet. Both have had the vaccine, though. I'm waiting to see how Jackson is going to do today. I feel so bad for him. He's like a radiator!

2) Did you go on a honeymoon? Where? Tell us about it.
My dad paid for our honeymoon. We went to Banner Elk, and stayed in dad's timeshare he has up there. We fished every day in the lake (pic's in that last link). It was awesome because it would be between 72-78oF during the day, then get between 40-50s at night. There's gas logs in the units so we had the best of both worlds, in July!!

3) If you could tour one country all expenses paid, where would you go?
Italy, hands down. If I believed in former lives, I would have to say I was Italian, LOL I love everything about that country as far as the food, land, etc. In Italy they stop in the middle of the day, like whole towns, to take a nap. That's my kind of place!!

4) What is your life verse and why?
Proverbs 3:5-6, self explanatory ;o)

5) What kind of car do you drive? What is your dream car?
I drive a white 2004 Pontiac Grand am, my dream car is a brand new pink Cadillac :p

6) If you work outside the home, what do you do, and do you like it? If you don't, what job would you like if you decided to/had to go to work?
I work in and out- I have a Mary Kay business!

7) What does your family do to celebrate Easter?
Church, dinner, ressurection cookies and biscuits ..

8) Are you naturally a morning person, or do you need "special conditions" to be able to function in the morningtime?
Yes, I require special conditions- an early bedtime, an early wakeup (having the ability to kick around a bit before I have to get ready...) and a good cup of coffee! Otherwise it's just not natural, lol I used to have to be at work at 6am every morning, it was nothing for me to hop out of bed around 4, shower, primp, and be all cheery and such BY 6!

9) Which way do you hang your toilet paper?

I don't, too lazy, lol is that bad? I don't even know where the spindle is :p

10) Do you remember where you were when the space Shuttle Challenger blew up in 1986?

Yes, I do. I was in 5th grade, they had brought a TV into our classroom so we could watch :o( That pretty much turned me off of any hope for a space fascination, really.

11) If money were no object, where would you go on your dream vacation? (I want details--time of year, weather, activities, etc.)

(copied form a previous post-) Italy, hands down. If I believed in former lives, I would have to say I was Italian, LOL I love everything about that country as far as the food, land, etc. In Italy they stop in the middle of the day, like whole towns, to take a nap. That's my kind of place!!

As for what we would do- I would want to go during harvest time and participate in the wine making process; I would want the weather to be fall'ish, I would want to visit the local restaurants, family and gourmet, and follow the chef's around and pick at their brains (hey, money's no object, I could buy that, couldn't I? ;o)

11) When did you first know there was a God?

Wow, what a great question. I truly understood there was a God when I was 14. I knew 'about' God while I was younger, but the understanding was not there. I believed when I was 21.

13) Up to this point what has been the best day of your life?

(copied from another post-) The day I witnessed Jackson being born again. That was priceless. I would dare say that seeing that happen was better than receiving my own salvation, but it is because of my own salvation and relationship with the Lord, that made that event as precious as it was- because I did have a clue. When I got saved I didn't have a clue as to what life would be like, but seeing him get saved, I knew that his life was going to be better than mine was growing up.

14) How to you talk to others to share Christ with them, if they are non saved?

I talk about him whether they're saved or not ;-) My conversation is pretty much a testimony, be it expressing thankfulness for 'whatever' (weather, that I didn't fall on that step, test grades, lol etc). It took me a while to be comfortable with the level of spirituality in my conversation, but the verse "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God." (1 Corinthians 10:31) really grabbed a hold of my heart and he would not leave me alone until I started speaking.

I guess he knows me well enough to know that one thing I do-do well is talk to people, and talking is something I do, therefore my conversation should be "to the glory of God". At first I was afraid people would cast me off as "religious", but I've found the opposite (imagine that, lol). I believe there has to be a level of tact, humility, and respect bundled into one when doing this, especially when you don't really KNOW who you're talking to, if that makes sense.

All this to say, my life is an open book with his praises coming off on every page. People tend to bring the spiritual side up them selves; so if they wanna talk, they know I'm all ears. Now, I do invite people to church, and to MK meetings (some meetings are quite spiritual depending on who's speaking- MK's philosophy is God first, family second, career third, and that is alays mentioned when guests are present. Which gives me another way to talk about the Lord- when I talk about MK to people ;-)

The sweetest gift I have ever received

This question was asked on one of my boards today, and thought it was worth a repeat here :)

The sweetest gift I've ever received would be ..... being able to witness Jackson being born again. That was priceless. I would dare say that seeing that happen was better than receiving my own salvation, but it is because of my own salvation and relationship with the Lord, that made that event as precious as it was- because I did have a clue. When I got saved I didn't have a clue as to what life would be like, but seeing him get saved, I knew that his life was going to be better than mine was growing up.

How about you?

"What Mrs C taught me"

Almost two months ago a dear woman in my life was told she had a brain tumor. A subsequent MRI a few days later showed two tumors, that would require two different surgeries. She was healed of both, in one surgery, that was finished in less than the estimated time to remove one of the two, much less both of them. I do plan on hosting her audio testimony soon on the internet so all my net friends can hear her tell it herself. But for now, you have me. You see, this woman was Jackson's k4 teacher three years ago.

Since Jackson has been in her class, I have been in awe of how a woman can be so loved, so faithful to the Lord, and in general- so happy. She is a teacher of all the children in our small, private Christian school in one way or another.... almost daily. She is devoted in her ministries at church, from mentoring wives- being a Titus 2 woman, to teaching children in grades 1-6 bell choir.

Last August, I "bribed" my own three year old class of 18 with her presence if they behaved themselves during our "Baby Day" performance. She was so known and loved by those children, at three years old- they were absolute angels up there on the stage, and was walking off the stage confirming that "Mrs C" was gonna come sing with us. For the woman to have never worked in the nursery ministry (4 yrs and up in her "speciality", after all!)- that is one shining testimony that she touched not only the children's lives she teaches, but their families as well.

This morning I had the opportunity to share with someone what Mrs C taught me through her trial. Or should I say, what the Lord used Mrs C to teach me these past couple of months ... and now that I think about it- she doesn't even know. So here it is ...

I had a friend who recently was diagnosed with two brain tumors, had surgery, and was completely healed- all within 4 weeks from beginning of the trial to the end!! I have learned so much from that experience because I tell ya, it rocked my world.

This woman had been the glimpse of light in many dark days of mine in the last three years, and has been the ultimate role model for me. The thought of losing her made me face a LOT of fears head on. One thing that got me was she never stopped smiling- ever. (She's one of those people that has a permanent smile, you know those people? lol) She said "This is God's plan for my life, I will be just fine either way this situation works out." WHOA!!

Then the Lord showed ME- that this woman has nothing different than I have. We both have the same mustard seed of faith (and if you are born again, you have that!!)- and we both have the same capacity to use that faith. He showed me I can choose to panic, or I can choose to trust him. Then he lead me to this verse-
".... for whatsoever is not of faith is sin" -- Romans 14:23

That made me really take a step back and rethink things. He showed me through my friend that we are not called to be happy, we are called to be Godly, to become holy. My friend was not smiling all the time because she was happy she had tumors in her brain that could possibly kill her. She was happy because she didn't allow her trial to steal the joy of her salvation(-)
"Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit." - Psalm 51:12
"I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels." -- Isaiah 61:10
"Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation.: Habakkuk 3:18

I'm facing a pretty stressful, trying trial right now myself, but it's so much better to be able to breathe easily knowing that the creator of the universe has his hand in my situation.

If it was not for Mrs C going through what she did, who knows how long it would have taken for me to learn this most important lesson ....

Thank you, Lord, for putting this wonderful godly woman in my life.